[Riddle of the Blackbirds] Deleted Scene: "InAttention"

[permetaform]

[explanation]
While I was writing Riddle of the Blackbirds this was an assumed backstory, but it didn't fit the storyline and clashed with the storytelling.

But then I realized that I'd already had DVD Extras at the end of the fic so hey! Might as well have deleted scenes too, ne?
[/explanation]

So I present to you

Riddle of the Blackbirds
DVD Extras -

InAttention
_{aka.rhythm excercise}

[]

And she sidles away from her father, unnoticed, and leaves for the stage she'd seen below.

She hauls him around and up against her, her grip rough and full of him. She hisses her contempt for him, like always, and he moans lightly because he hears her, she thinks. It's beautiful, and she might not use the gun she runs on his unbroken jaw.

He makes her feel glorious and she thinks she'll keep him; though she wishes he could see his own brokenness.

She takes his lips, because they're hers to take--

Forgets the gun in her hand when she falls.

back

Comments

[linaelyn.livejournal.com]

ANOTHER ONE!!!!

ashjdkghfsjghaslg

Yes, yes of course. the rhythm of this one. I had to turn off the music, because they were *fighting* each other.

I wish I had the words for this, the musical notation: Da DA da da DA dada DA DADA

Ah. I think I found it. Is it deliberate that it works with that song? Track 1 on the CD? Knowing you, OF COURSE IT IS. But I could be wrong about what you've done deliberately.

Just watched the scene again. I don't know how you've done it, but it's exactly as circe_tigana said: A chance for a crappy, colourful mess of a movie to inspire some of the most creatively structured fanfic I've both read and written.

Re:

[permetaform]

I'd actually written it before trying it out with music...like a theme for Ajedrez perhaps, but the one with the best rhythm to match to it is Eye Patch (#3); but in *syncopation* only...which makes an odd sort of sense because Rodriguez mentioned in his music commentary that Eye Patch is a funky, flunky version of Sands Theme.

Anywhoo, the lines work best when driven straight *through* the heavy guitar rhythms, in opposition so to speak...

::hugs:: so glad you like. This one felt the most oddly experimental out of all of my OUaTiM so far.

[xoverau.livejournal.com]

Eeeeee, what a brilliant idea!

Re:

[permetaform]

thank you!

[sands-eyes.livejournal.com]

WOW!! That's all I can say about this!! You guys are so freakin talented!!!! The Ajedrez is awesome!!!!

Re:

[permetaform]

Thank you!