FAQ: for new friends

[permetaform]

::waves:: Hi! Welcome to the insanity!

Note:
- If you're underage where you live: please don't tell me, please use the internet responsibly, and please don't get me in trouble.
- I don't mind comments from "strangers", just be polite =).
- I don't mind if you lurk.
- I don't mind if you friend me.
- I don't mind if you de-friend me.
- I won't necessarily friend back, 'cause Life = Insane
- I don't mind OT comments.
- I don't mind if you start random threads with other people in my comments.
- I don't mind at all if you link to any of my public posts.
- I don't mind bad!fic.
- I don't mind no feedback. But feedback, encourages me to produce more of the same. (instead of, say, something different)

Warnings:

You can de-friend me at any time. No really, any time.

There will frequently be ramblings about how awesome I find the concept of various m/m relationships. If this bothers you, please don't bother reading this journal as I'll be posting at length about the matter.

This is mostly a journal about fannish activities of mine; to err on the side of caution, consider this LJ generally non-worksafe.

General Info: I think of this LJ as an easily-updated fan website, but I treat the comment threads like a party I'm hosting. I don't mind OT comments and adore it when you start convo's with each other in the threads. I rarely f-lock, and when I do its usually just whining and emo.

per·meta·form = permutations of metaphor
Some of my work appear under kanzeyori (kanze·yori) which means "twisted paper".
My Directorium
My OTP pairings in various fandoms

My Fanwork: Links to all my vids, fics, and recs are found in my userinfo, I have additional recs saved under "my recs" in my memories. (If you're curious these are my fandoms and fave pairings) Any icon that I made is fair game; if you like it, take it. This Hakkai moodtheme I made is also fair game, if you want, take.

On Vids: Please don't direct-link to my vids, but it's perfectly okay to link to my vid-post if you want. Don't clip off my vids please. I answer and appreciate all forms of feedback/critique.

My vids
Big List of Vid Meta
My amv.org account

Want Links/Recs?: my recs policy

my del.icio.us
Search by fandom using the tags in my sidebar (most recent)
or look in my memories - most recent recs (from 2004-09-23 to present)
or check out permetaform_rec - all recs up to 2004-09-23

In The Pit: my fanfiction.net account, and will eventually back-up all my work on ff.n and generally think it an awesome idea that writers are backing up their work in multiple places. I am manager of the Saiyuki C2 community for Hakkai and Gojyo, which includes both friendship fic and shonen-ai fic and threesome fic with them in it.

On RPAS: If you're wondering about RPAS, this post explains it more or less. (ie. watch me write Camera/JohnnyDepp; in that order)

On Filters: I have several reading lists of people (to save my sanity), they're listed on the sidebar here. I rarely flock, and only if I'm trying to conserve bandwidth or if I'm being whiny/spazzy or some other such reason.

On Memes: Memes that I take are posted HERE, because I think ya'll will skewer me if I post any more than I already do...

I am:
- a vidder, a reccer, a writer
- about 60% liberal, 40% conservative
- a deist
- a Slytherin (with Ravenclaw leanings), a Pisces (Gemini Ascendant, Aries Moon), and a Water Pig

Five Things You May Not Know that are Really Important to my Character are:

1) The easiest way to get me to do something is to make me *want* to do it. Threats just make me contrary.

2) If I'm upset, the quickest way to calm me down is to turn on the music and leave me alone.

3) I absorb other's moods/personalities/opinions way too easily. My first reaction is usually too rash and not very well thought out and I usually try to tamp down on it until I have a chance to be alone and work out all my thoughts on the matter. This means that it may take awhile for me to get a response to your comment.

4) The easiest way to visibly piss me off is to make my head and heart hurt simutaneously; an example would be something that is both unlogical and hurtful to myself or others. (ie. GWBush.)

5) If *either* my head or my heart is pissed (and not both), you won't know until I've had ample time to sort out exactly *why* I'm pissed...'cause I might just be pissed for no reason, once I've had a chance to look at it. Because if I'm pissed, and there was no reason, then why should I take it out on anybody else? If I'm pissed and there *is* a reason, then I'll let you know.

If not, don't stress.

Story of your arrival in fandom?

I'd initially started out in anime fandom through Ranma 1/2. It has a boy that changes into a girl when hit by water, the yaoi was inevitable. After being a bit disturbed by the thought, I happened upon Slayers anime. Instant love. First m/m pairing was Xelloss/Zelgadiss, enemies that sometimes help each other out, ie. my second fanfic!hotbutton. (my first fanfic!hotbutton is resurrection fic)

I tumbled through anime boy-love fandoms for awhile and then chanced upon Joxer/Ares. Was a bit confused and disturbed by *guys* fucking (versus *boys* fucking or boys that sometimes look like girls except with cocks) and the grittiness of the fic, but then got used to it and dived right in. And everything else was pretty much a straight descent into the flaming pits of various special hells.

Oh! I managed to resist HP fandom for awhile, was minorly disturbed, but got over it, and incidentally through it got past pretty much every single squick possible.

I blame Snape.

In the end, I got onto LJ because of nocturne_ally and became active in LJ fandom because of Pirates of the Caribbean.

I used to rec a lot more, but as of now vidding and meta has eaten my brain.

Five Things You May Not Know About My Core Personality are:

1) I don't think linearly. I think in pictures, sounds, ideas, and concept; and words give extra meaning to me through their resonance and 'feel' in my mouth and I...'see/sense' the words in my mind through a cascade list of their meanings. I register intonation more than the words themselves sometimes, it takes concentration for me to hear lyrics in song, and sometimes conversation doesn't register (even though it's spoken loudly) 'cause I don't hear them as words. It's hard for me to communicate because communication is linear and I'm always struggling to translate. It takes me awhile to get my words out.

2) I am a dreamer. At its best it causes me to set high goals for myself, at its worst it causes me to be escapist and avoidant. I'm still trying to balance this out somehow.

3) I am ambitious. Why bother dreaming if your dreams will never come true? Why bother doing, if it cannot be done excellently?

4) I am somewhat arrogant. This is in the way that I believe that I can somehow get whatever I'm imagining to be actually done. Or rather, I mostly believe that I can get my dreams to come true. I frequently have to try to check myself on this; it causes me to run pell-mell with random ideas without fleshing it out, it causes me to sometimes run off at the mouth, and it causes me to be stupid. It also caused me to start writing fanfic (my first was Xel/Lina I think) 'cause I thought I could write better than what I was seeing throught the ML. Which in hindsight, not so much...::shrugs:: I check myself and double check myself, 'cause I know that my sense of perspective isn't like others perspectives. Just kick me if I'm being stupid, yes?

5) I am a doubter. I try to poke holes into logic, I love debate. This sometimes make me sound very negative when all I'm trying to do maintain the debate thread/conversation. I doubt my perceptions because I perceive things differently than most people. I doubt other people's perceptions 'cause they perceive things differently from me. I doubt my ability, my creativity, my will. I...am very aware that what I stand on physically, spiritually, morally, and mentally is very non-solid; but I'll stand on it best I can, and try to prepare to shift if need be.

Random Things:

1) I ****LOATHE**** the telephone. So I procrastinate heavily on any and all calls I have to make.

Part of it is that I think I have horrible phone voice, another is that I think I have a horrible voice, in general, and the sheer physical fact of a phone makes me all the more aware that I am *speaking*. Part of how I got over my fear of communicating badly is to be totally oblivious to the fact that I am possibly making a fool of myself; and thus part of what I'm making myself oblivious to is the fact that my voice is making sounds.

2) I really really love and empathize with/along/through and find peace with the element water.

A piece of Persian poetry by Sohrab Sepehry, expresses it perfectly:

From Green To Green

I, in this darkness,
am imagining a bright lamb
who comes to graze
on the grass of my exhaustion

I, in this darkness,
see the wet extension
of my arms under a rainfall,
that rain which drenched the first prayers of man

I, in this darkness,
opened the door to ancient meadows,
to goldens
upon the wall of myth,
whereon we feasted our eyes.

I, in this darkness
say roots--and for the new growth
on the bush of death
I expressed:

"water"