I've read through the entire thread, Permeta-san. I dunno if it's because i'm 10 or more years yrs removed from the events or that i'm three times as stubborn about the harassment i did have. I went to school as the only mixed child in a hugely caucasian area, because the town was so small.
I started out fine in elementary. Then it didn't matter that i was mulitracial, adopted. That i knew what the concepts meant and didn't mind telling people outright when my parents(who are caucasian) got weird looks in public. I didn't care at all then. The only thing i'd been teased about for a little bit was that i called my Mom, 'Mum' a few times. Something i'd picked up since she is Canadian, and calls Gramma that. Didn't help that one set of my god parents hails from Liverpool, England either. ^_^ But that just breezed over compared to what happened later.
Junior high changed that. Both boys and girls latched onto the fact that i was smart, alone and at that point growing my hair out. Somewhere, someone along the line in 6th grade started calling me 'afro'. From then on i heard it from every day, around the corner from everyone but my closest friends. I only had 2 of them. I was never much for heavy socilization by nature, but that hurt. Those friends made no move to defend me, but we enjoyed each other's company. I also had choir to keep me in school. I hadn't had that i probably would have dropped out. I simply lost myself in the songs, even with my still immature voice. I could carry a tune, i loved what i did. I still kept up with grades and kept to myself, but it never let up.
It didn't until 8th grade. There was a new boy, he was cute enough to make even the popular girls drool. I made friends with him by being myself. I've always said hi to the new people, when everyone else was embarrassed. The taunts of 'afro' and 'afro angie' gradually stopped. Because he was the darling of all the girls--and he was my friend. Yes he was cute, but he was sarcastic. Intelligent, and had a penchant for wearing Metallica t-shirts. He wasnt' overly popular then, but he was a rogue and for a while we were friends. It was long enough to end the namecalling that had destroyed my confidence and self-esteem. The teachers never stopped it.
By 8th grade i'd discovered relaxers of a strength that didn't 'fry' my hair to a crisp, of which i wanted. I was tired of heavy snarls and not being able to work with my hair in any way. Previously id' even tried to fit in with everyone, following trends. Still made me depressed, so i stopped that. So right at about the same time, i'd found a way to manage my annoyingly unique hair, and a friend to end the harassment.
High school was easier. I was still heavily into choir, but the harassment stopped. It took me until 11th grade to rebuild most of my confidence, bit by bit. I ended up hanging out in a group of geeks no one would touch, just because we were ourselves. In a school of 1600 kids, that's saying something. We had a calc genius, and an engineering genius both of them male. Our little group played Euchre or Magic:The Gathering. I was reading shakespeare in my spare time, or sheet music for the Choral i was a happy member of. I'd even had some geniune voice classes on scholarship. So i'd found a way to be happy on my own. Authority hadn't done shit, all i'd done was make a path for myself. I also stopped caring about the popularity food chain, which made the biggest difference. They ceased to intimidate me from then on. I think my decision to enlist in the USAF had something to do with that, in the 10th grade.
That was my pubic school. The ironic thing about the entire escapade of harassment, was in junior high? I'd gone to school since i was 5 with at least a third of those kids doing the harassment! But having been a loner by nature that wasn't overly social even then, i stuck out in several ways. Intelligence not the least of them.
I still have a huge dislike of cliques, but i'm willing to talk to anyone for the sheer joy of it. I didn't let them win. I may not have fought back, but i was winning in the psychological front, which is more than i could say for a lot of people i went to class with.
My nephew's going to be in a similar situation in a couple of years. I hope it won't be bad for him (but fear it will be), but I hope he gets through it the way you did.
Things have changed a bit since the 80s and 90s when that occurred. I was also in a very small town. So those may make a difference. Society is becoming gradually more accepting of those that were once ostracized for simply being an obvious racial mixture. ^_^ Good luck to your nephew!
The only reason i got through it, was that i was twice as stubborn as those doing the harassment. I believe it's called tenacity. *evil grin*
Kinda why i can get into Gojyo's head so easily too. Being neither one nor the other, and dont' give a crap otherwise. Also being too tough to take down, no matter what gets tossed at us. But i'd never wish it on anyone else--ever.
I didn't let them win. I may not have fought back, but i was winning in the psychological front, which is more than i could say for a lot of people i went to class with.
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I started out fine in elementary. Then it didn't matter that i was mulitracial, adopted. That i knew what the concepts meant and didn't mind telling people outright when my parents(who are caucasian) got weird looks in public. I didn't care at all then. The only thing i'd been teased about for a little bit was that i called my Mom, 'Mum' a few times. Something i'd picked up since she is Canadian, and calls Gramma that. Didn't help that one set of my god parents hails from Liverpool, England either. ^_^ But that just breezed over compared to what happened later.
Junior high changed that. Both boys and girls latched onto the fact that i was smart, alone and at that point growing my hair out. Somewhere, someone along the line in 6th grade started calling me 'afro'. From then on i heard it from every day, around the corner from everyone but my closest friends. I only had 2 of them. I was never much for heavy socilization by nature, but that hurt. Those friends made no move to defend me, but we enjoyed each other's company. I also had choir to keep me in school. I hadn't had that i probably would have dropped out. I simply lost myself in the songs, even with my still immature voice. I could carry a tune, i loved what i did. I still kept up with grades and kept to myself, but it never let up.
It didn't until 8th grade. There was a new boy, he was cute enough to make even the popular girls drool. I made friends with him by being myself. I've always said hi to the new people, when everyone else was embarrassed. The taunts of 'afro' and 'afro angie' gradually stopped. Because he was the darling of all the girls--and he was my friend. Yes he was cute, but he was sarcastic. Intelligent, and had a penchant for wearing Metallica t-shirts. He wasnt' overly popular then, but he was a rogue and for a while we were friends. It was long enough to end the namecalling that had destroyed my confidence and self-esteem. The teachers never stopped it.
By 8th grade i'd discovered relaxers of a strength that didn't 'fry' my hair to a crisp, of which i wanted. I was tired of heavy snarls and not being able to work with my hair in any way. Previously id' even tried to fit in with everyone, following trends. Still made me depressed, so i stopped that. So right at about the same time, i'd found a way to manage my annoyingly unique hair, and a friend to end the harassment.
High school was easier. I was still heavily into choir, but the harassment stopped. It took me until 11th grade to rebuild most of my confidence, bit by bit. I ended up hanging out in a group of geeks no one would touch, just because we were ourselves. In a school of 1600 kids, that's saying something. We had a calc genius, and an engineering genius both of them male. Our little group played Euchre or Magic:The Gathering. I was reading shakespeare in my spare time, or sheet music for the Choral i was a happy member of. I'd even had some geniune voice classes on scholarship. So i'd found a way to be happy on my own. Authority hadn't done shit, all i'd done was make a path for myself. I also stopped caring about the popularity food chain, which made the biggest difference. They ceased to intimidate me from then on. I think my decision to enlist in the USAF had something to do with that, in the 10th grade.
That was my pubic school. The ironic thing about the entire escapade of harassment, was in junior high? I'd gone to school since i was 5 with at least a third of those kids doing the harassment! But having been a loner by nature that wasn't overly social even then, i stuck out in several ways. Intelligence not the least of them.
I still have a huge dislike of cliques, but i'm willing to talk to anyone for the sheer joy of it. I didn't let them win. I may not have fought back, but i was winning in the psychological front, which is more than i could say for a lot of people i went to class with.
no subject
My nephew's going to be in a similar situation in a couple of years. I hope it won't be bad for him (but fear it will be), but I hope he gets through it the way you did.
no subject
The only reason i got through it, was that i was twice as stubborn as those doing the harassment. I believe it's called tenacity. *evil grin*
Kinda why i can get into Gojyo's head so easily too. Being neither one nor the other, and dont' give a crap otherwise. Also being too tough to take down, no matter what gets tossed at us. But i'd never wish it on anyone else--ever.
no subject
And good on you, for being so damn strong. (Happier note: oooh, I do like that icon.)
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I didn't let them win. I may not have fought back, but i was winning in the psychological front, which is more than i could say for a lot of people i went to class with.
*yes*. ::highfives::