Le Sigh.

[permetaform]

Life has gone insane and I find myself both losing too much sleep trying to catch up and not being involved enough while trying to catch up 'cause I'm spreading myself too thin. God, you'd think I'd learn by now about spreading myself too thin.

Prepare the front and the rear has few.
Prepare the left and the right has few.
Everywhere prepared, everywhere few.
~ Sun Tzu

I swear, I need to paste that somewhere prominent. I would on my head, but then I can't read it.

You'd think I'd learn. ::headdesks::

On that note, I'm clipping my friendslist. 750 is far too insane, and I can read fast but I still have a limit and time is short and I'm not giving people the attention they deserve and I *want* to be friends with everyone who friends me back but...fuck.

Because of the frienditto scare, I've realized that I *want* this journal to be a fan journal. I want it most of all to be where I can interact with fans of whatever fandom I'm in. But that doesn't work well on the internet, I don't think I (personally) can handle putting RL and fandom in one open forum.

One has to go, and I chose to keep fandom.

I'm not sure what that says about me. Or if it says anything. People keep on complaining about others who compartementalize too much, but I think that if I *don't* compartementalize I'll just bleed right through. Perhaps, if on some level, you don't compartementalize, you'll fall apart, mind into heart into gut into feces. It becomes one big undifferentiated mass...but I dunno if that argument is even applicable here.

I know I've moved from the fandoms I've originally met most of you; don't feel bad if you de-friend me, there's no bad feelings from me if you do.

Actually, if you're anything like me, the whole concept of de-friending leaves me queasy. Guilt-complex.

Mother-dear trained me well.

Comments

Woa...

[jackfan2.livejournal.com]

::Raises hand along with the masses on your flist:: I too don't mind if you de-friend me- Oh, you're right. That just sounds like someone died... Ok, how about we call it 'narrowing the focus', or some such gentler semantic.

I truly don't mind if you remove me then, or narrow your focus *w*. I'll always just check on you because I too consider your input into fandom and writing most amazing and inspiring.

You know, I do know of others who create and maintain two journals; one for fanfic and the other for personal stuffs. It's certainly a good way to sort things so you, in a way, sort your flist by doing that. Maybe you'll not need to 'narrow your focus', it'll be done for you in that separation.

But, you do what works for you. I suggest you, Number 1: B-R-E-A-T-H, Number 2: More breathing, Number 3: Take a long relaxing walk to clear your head, Number 3: Take a very deep breath and do what needs doing to maintain sanity- divide and conquer.

I know, I'm probably over-simplifying this, but it's a place to start, a jumping off point, if you will. Sounds like that would be a good thing; a place to start. Honestly, sometimes RL can be so freakin' over-whelming that it runs in an endless loop of insanity. You can't sever the circle, because life is a circle and, well, severing is not good. Try Yoga, though I can't attest to it's positive attributes as I've never gone there, but I have great friends who do and they love how centered it makes them feel. I use regular ol' exercise to find my center and release stress and for me that's enough.

Well, you take care of you. REALLY! Chamomile tea is nice, though I'm not much of a tea-drinker...

Be well, and be good, or just be. When RL is demanding on you, you lose that 'be', that you that you are.

*blink - blink* Okay, I just gave myself a brain cramp.

Re: Woa...

[permetaform]

I'll always just check on you because I too consider your input into fandom and writing most amazing and inspiring.

awwww.. ::GLOMP:: wow.

and yeah, good advice, all of it, I'll keep that in mind. ::hugs hard::